The Surprising Parenting Mistake That Could Be Affecting Your Child’s Resilience

A mother and daughter sitting together on the floor at home
A mother and daughter sitting together on the floor at home

Parenting is an incredible journey, filled with joys and challenges. But who knew one common mistake might be holding our children back? It’s easy to get caught up in doing everything for them, but doing so might raise ‘mentally weak children’.

Here’s the scoop: Psychiatrist Dr. Daniel Amen has shared some insight that’s thought-provoking. Through simple but effective advice, he reveals how overparenting could be a hidden trap. His take on building mental toughness is something every parent should hear, especially if fostering independence is the goal.

Teaching children to take responsibility isn’t a one-time lesson; it’s a continuous process. The temptation to step in and solve their problems is strong, but it’s not always beneficial.

Dr. Christine Carter, a sociologist, advises that kids should sometimes ‘blow it.’ This approach allows them to learn firsthand how to rectify mistakes. It’s not just about accountability; it’s about realizing that errors are part of life. Kids grow when they understand that their actions have consequences.

It’s natural to want to help your child at every turn, but there’s danger in doing too much.

When parents step in constantly, they inadvertently rob their children of valuable problem-solving skills. Dr. Amen emphasizes the importance of letting kids face challenges head-on.

Providing solutions too readily can inflate parental self-esteem while shrinking a child’s. Allow them to experience difficulties to encourage development. They learn better when they figure out solutions on their own.

Dr. Amen shares anecdotes from his own life to drive the point home. If his daughter forgot something for school, she’d go without. It’s tough love, but effective.

Children learn best through experience. When faced with the consequences of their actions, lessons are more impactful, teaching them lessons that stick longer.

Dr. Amen’s own daughter quickly learned to remember her belongings. Missing out on rewards teaches preparedness and self-reliance.

Being bored isn’t necessarily a bad thing; it can be a catalyst for creativity.

Dr. Amen suggests asking children, ‘What are you going to do about it?’ when they complain of boredom. This encourages them to devise their own solutions.

This approach isn’t just about combating boredom; it’s about fostering independent thinking. Let them find their own entertainment or interests; it builds character and resourcefulness.

Dr. Amen stresses the need to build resilience in children. Resilience is not developed when children are overly shielded from adversity and challenges.

Encouraging children to work through small setbacks prepares them for bigger ones in life.

Facing minor hiccups allows them to build their confidence and the tools they need to handle larger issues without fear or hesitation.

Striking the right balance between helping and letting kids navigate independently is key. It’s not easy, but it’s essential.

Parents must assess situations carefully to decide when to step in and when to hold back. Each scenario is unique, and sometimes assistance is necessary.

Other times, stepping back ensures children learn to navigate the complexities of life themselves, bolstering their problem-solving abilities.

Choices empower children, enabling them to learn and grow in dynamic ways.

Giving children choices promotes independence and decision-making skills. It’s about teaching them to weigh options and foresee outcomes.

Guide them when needed, but let them make some decisions on their own. This practice boosts their confidence and critical thinking.

There are times when letting go can be tough. Parents want to see their kids succeed without the bumps along the road.

Yet, experiencing and overcoming small defeats helps children to cultivate resilience and perseverance.

A gentle guiding hand can sometimes be more effective than jumping in to solve everything. It builds children’s ability to adapt and thrive amidst challenges.

Parenting isn’t about creating a smooth path but supporting children as they navigate rough patches.

Grasping this perspective makes it easier to accept short-term discomfort for long-term growth, setting children up for future success.

As parents, seeing children struggle might be tough, but it helps them grow strong and capable in the long run.


Parenting isn’t about perfection but progress. Small changes can make a big difference.

By stepping back a little, parents can empower their children to become resilient and independent individuals. It’s a journey worth taking.

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